This is one of the cutest videos I’ve seen in a while–children trying to not eat marsh mellows. Pure genius! I especially like the way each kid chooses to deal with the problem, whether tapping the plate, picking off pieces of the marsh mellow, or trying to distract himself. Kids rock.

According to this poll conducted by Maple Leaf Foods on the (hilariously named) website Bacon Today, 43% of Canadian men prefer bacon to sex.

Furthermore, 23% of men ranked bacon as their favorite scent, and the same percentage wondered if “my partner loves bacon more than they love me.”

Either Canadians are terrible lovers, or the bacon up there is really good.

[via Bacon Today]

Men on Twitter have 15% more followers than women. Forbes has decided to remedy this by releasing a list of the 20 “Most Inspirational” female Twitter users. Among them are a marketing professor at Stanford, an OB/GYN and a former New York Times restaurant critic.

So unsubscribe from Heidi Montag’s Twitter and start getting some tweets that actually make you enjoy being a girl. Do it.

A 21-year-old groom in Idaho was arrested twice on the eve of his wedding, charged with the assault of his new wife. The first arrest was Sunday just after the marriage, and the second after he was released on bail. He got home from the prison and began to slap and choke her, at which point he was arrested again.

This makes me think long and hard about marriage. And also Idaho.

Tiger Woods’ agent, Mark Steinberg, has announced that the disgraced golfer will hold a press conference on Friday “to discuss his past and his future”. In a rather confusing distinction, Steinberg continues that after speaking with “a small group of friends, colleagues and close associates”, Woods will not be taking questions from reporters. So are the reporters part of this intimate group, or not…?

I’m not sure that Woods necessarily has to apologize for his extramarital affairs and alleged sex addiction, however. I hate cheaters like the rest of them, but if the cheating was in the bedroom rather than on the links, he shouldn’t be obligated to make formal reparations with his fans. Yes, sports stars are especially idolized, so the revelation that Woods was getting some on the side (perhaps a lot, if all of the women’s stories are to be believed) has shocked a lot of people. But there’s a line between being inspired by an athlete and holding them accountable for human errors that don’t affect their professional lives. After all, you don’t see celebrities holding press conferences to apologize for alleged affairs — because it’s truly not other people’s business.

Now, if he wants to apologize for missing the season while in rehab or wherever he was, then yes, that’s reasonable. But the personal, marital reconciliation should be between Woods and his wife Elin Nordegren. It’ll be interesting to see what sort of statement he actually gives this Friday at the the TPC Sawgrass headquarters of the PGA Tour in Florida.

[Via NY Daily News]

[Image source: Your Sports Night Cap]

You may already know this from Best In Show, but the Westminster Dog Show is a really big deal. People spend $1 million on their pedigree pets and it attracts more than 2,500 dogs in 173 categories of breeds. The 134th show was just held at Madison Square Garden.

It’s ranked as the No. 6 sport in New York (which says more about New York than the dog show itself, in my opinion) and this year’s Best In Show was claimed by Sadie the Scottish terrier.

[pic via Sports Illustrated]

Since when does Fat Tuesday fall immediately after Valentine’s Day? That’s the case this year, apparently, though I didn’t even realize til I had woken up today and therefore wasn’t able to aptly plan a proper pig-out before the forty days of abstaining from sweets, meats, and other treats. Thing is, I don’t usually give up stuff for Lent anyway… Still, if you’re gonna observe one portion of this strange binge-fast tradition, it might as well be the fun one.

Mardi Gras, the more formal name for Fat Tuesday, caps the five-month span wherein it’s socially acceptable to stuff your face with sweets, mostly candy. I’m talking

- Halloween haul: whether or not you trick or treat, you still manage to amass a hefty collection
- Christmas goodies: I always look forward to the marzipan in my stocking
- Valentine’s Day gifts: whether your partner surprises you with the quintessential box of chocolates, you go out for a snazzy dessert, or you buy yourself some candy to mope

That’s almost half the year of sugary overload. Yet surprisingly, from what I’ve heard over Twitter while working in the office today, this year’s Fat Tuesday seems fairly low-key. More than a few reports of eating pancakes for dinner have cropped up, and some lucky folks are making quick trips to New Orleans. Some lunch places are offering up fried-shrimp po’boys and the like, but no big parties in my vicinity. Otherwise, attention is already shifting to what people are giving up for Lent.

Though I dutifully gave up some small vice each year in grade school — mostly because, if I remember correctly, we were graded on keeping track of our progress and I wasn’t yet crafty enough to lie for forty days — lately I’ve found it harder and harder to really support. Yes, if you deprive yourself of carbs for forty days it’s sort of like Jesus starving in the desert, but at the end of it you get to go back to your fatty ways and he gets to die. The comparison is pretty limited. Why not retain these dietary restrictions for the entire year, like my vegetarian roommate who also keeps kosher? If you’re that dedicated, it should be a small sacrifice, right?

One possible solution to that lack of investment could be the “technology fast” that UK bishops are calling for — could you survive without not only Facebook, but also without electric light and buying clothes, for forty days?

A good compromise, I’ve found, is the practice of choosing one aspect of yourself to improve; i.e., emphasizing an action instead of giving up something. I’m not sure if this is legitimate within any church, since doing good deeds is definitely expected year-round; further, couldn’t “I’ll exercise more” or “I’ll listen to my coworkers instead of shooting them down” easily qualify as secular New Year’s resolutions? Still, it’s a good deal for those who have felt themselves falling by the wayside, religious or not, and who just want to improve their and others’ well-beings.

So, I’ve settled it — I’m grabbing a Belgian liege wafel with spekuloos spread from the NYC @waffletruck tonight after class. And for the next forty days, maybe I’ll try to donate to the homeless more often, or not ignore the Greenpeace people on the streets. (Fat chance on the latter.) What about you guys?

[Image source: Chicago Weekend Fun!]

Afterwards, he felt like an idiot for blurting it out for a few reasons– for one thing, it sort of killed the mood. Also, maybe she didn’t want anything serious either, which makes him look like an arrogant pre-emptive dickhead. But mostly he regretted it because in all honesty he wasn’t totally closed off to the idea of a relationship.

So then why’d you say it? I asked him.

“I dunno, it’s just something you say,” he said.

College co-eds everywhere, but especially at the University of North Carolina according to this New York Times article, are stuck with a shitty boy-to-girl-ratio and have to blindly navigate this thing called “the hookup culture.” This phrase, coined no doubt by the middle-aged, means nothing to people under 20, because for us this is just “the way it is.” If we can get our hookup friend to hang out with us sober, that’s our generation’s version of splitting a chocolate shake at the soda shoppe.

A UNC frat party 52 years ago.

But the thing is, as much as the depiction of the UNC girls is stereotypical and offensive (and believe me, it is), the guys don’t really represent the best of college men either. All the guys in the article are huge douches. To the point where it seems like the writer got his sound-bites at a reality show casting call for “The Biggest Douche.”

My friend’s not a douche, although he and the UNC boys have the same ratio in their favor– like the rest of us, he’s just blindly navigating the hookup culture. Having too many options is hard, and one way to deal with that is to not make a decision. Maybe even the “Idon’twantanythingserious!” boys wish we could go back to the soda shoppe.

[pic via NY Times]

As a shoutout to perpetually-broke twenty-somethings trying to keep it classy on Valentine’s Day without breaking the bank, we Ologists have prepared a go-to guide for classic, budget friendly dates. Without further ado, we present Listology: Places To Take Your Girlfriend/Boyfriend On February 14th Without Dropping Half Your Rent.

1. The Park
If you’re an East Coaster, it’s a little cold these days, but nothing some hot cocoa and a snowball fight can’t fix. Put on your long underwear and make snow angels. Afterwards go home and make some chocolate fondue. Why not? You burned enough calories and saved enough cash today.
Ballpark cost: $15 (hot chocolate, fondue ingredients)

2. The Movies
Tell me this isn’t a classic. Be traditional (Valentine’s Day, It’s Complicated) or ironic (Tooth Fairy, starring Duane “The Rock” Johnson). Or be backhanded and see a thriller like Legion or Shutter Island, just for an excuse to grab each other during the “gotcha” moments. Popcorn and Twizzlers optional, but recommended.
Ballpark cost: $25 (two movie tickets, candy, soda)

3. Staycation
Remember that honeymoon scene in It’s A Wonderful Life? Everyman Jimmy Stewart just gave their vacation money to the needy residents of Bedford Falls, and he makes it up to his new wife by dressing their house in a Hawaii theme. It’s almost more romantic than the actual vacation. So stop by the Dollar Tree or Party City and drape your house in an exotic locale.

Go forth! Be cheap! If you do it right, it’ll be a Valentine’s Day neither of you will forget.

[pic via MSN]